
Well, if there is any reason for me to finish up Kingdom f*cking Hearts 1, it’s for this.
Announced at Tokyo Game Show 2007, Square Enix will be releasing new Kingdom Hearts games that further pump money into Disney… all because of a fucking mouse.
But, that’s not what made Kingdom Hearts what it is, it was the ZOMG SEPHIROTH NEXT TO GOOFY LOL.
Anyway, here’s what those games will be.
Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days (Nintendo DS) will revolve around the guy who named this game. Seriously, MATH? I thought we played video games to STOP THINKING!
But, anyway, 358/2 Days will tell the story of some people named Roxas and Axel, who defend Twilight Town. I think. Again, I haven’t even completed the first Kingdom Hearts. It will be a single AND multiplayer 3D adventure title, with you playing as Roxas & 3 of the Organization XIII Members of Axel, Saix & Xigbar. Whoever they are. New characters rumored to be involved.
Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep (Sony PSP) will be about the people who wielded the Keyblade before Sora (NOW I KNOW WHO THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT! YAY!) and one of them was called Master Xehanort, and his only disciple suddenly disappears, an omen of the great disaster that would subsequently erupt. Interesting. It’s a single-player game with Olympus Colliseum and Sleeping Beauty stages confirmed.
Kingdom Hearts: Coded (Mobile) follows Jiminy Cricket and his alzeihmer’s. Old fart. After the events of Kingdom Hearts 2, Jiminy heads back to Disney Castle, and decides to read the memo he’s been writing. There’s one page that shocks him: “We have to go back, to heal their pain.” The King then does something that allows them to investigate. And in a world traced by the Jiminy Memo, the Destiny Islands, a sleeping boy awakens.
Well, there you have it. Be excited and whatnot. I honestly can’t, I haven’t even gotten past Agrabah in KH 1. *sigh*
-Eric “MegaRyu”